Thanks H4L I should clarify, OW hasn't re-emerged... that we know of. It's just that H is worried that she may be continuing contact with co-workers and worrying what she might be saying. We've done better not focusing on fears of what we can't control.
H was in a funk yesterday. This sitch has strained many areas of our lives, including finances. We had to talk about that yesterday, and he can't handle it. It sends him into a very dark place emotionally and he said yesterday that his frustration with finances was a huge part of the "fuel" that led him to thinking he wanted to "walk away" (yes, he used those words!) from his life and have a "do over" life. I tried to validate, but when he gets like that I can't validate too much or it makes it worse. I think that is a mistake I made before the A. So, I did a 180 yesterday and told him "Our situation is what it is, we are working together to make positive changes and improve it as best we can. In the meantime, I am not going to let you get so down about it. Let's do something else." We went for a little drive and then watched a movie. It helped a bit, but he struggled still. In the past, I would have let his mood get me down too. But, I must have made some progress in emotional detachment during this sitch, because I find I am better able to not let that happen anymore.
