What can I do to save my marriage? Help

[DDogs]

Time to wake up Tridoc..


Your wife met someone in Phoenix. Don't be so silly and naieve
here. Quit trying to ignore the elephant in the living room..

Women don't go on vacations by themselves like this...
If someone comes into your office as a patient and has a growth or tumor the size of a grapefruit protruding out of their neck and tell you it is just swollen a bit, do you allow them to self diagnose or do you tell them the truth? Do you allow them to think what they want to believe so they won't be hurt by facing the facts? Same thing here for you. This isn't just swollen, this is an affair happening.

You need to CALL her out on this behavior. Makes her view you as weak when you allow it and act like the "supporting" husband..... notes in her luggage, have a good time... YUK..


come on man.. WISE UP HERE... FACT the TRUTH.. She went to Phoenix for a rendevous.. This is what people do when in an affair..

Tridoc,,, Been reading and following along,, Unfortuntely, I agree about this being a rendevous.

And also unfortunately, I'm speaking from my own inappropriate behavior and experience when I tell you W probably had the fantasy of an exciting secret get away,,, in her mind she's probably thinking and justifying it, probably irrationally telling herself, "ok,,, it was already planned.. I'm just going to go to possibly to say good bye, one last fling, H will never now, he has no way to. I can handle this emotionally etc...." kinda like thinking of the future as a 10 minute time frame.... not the big picture,, they block that out..

It's what an addict tells himself about his next fix...

No expert here either, but I am learning from a sea of experts here, Best advice I can offer is to detatch, and get YOUR life in order...