As someone who suffered (and now mostly conquered) anxiety attacks I can relate to how you are feeling and also echo everything SDFoundgirl posted.
The one thing I learned is there is no measure as to why we feel anxiety. There are not proper reasons to feel anxiety. If you are experiencing anxiety/panic attacks for *any* reason then the reason is significant.
I was scared to death when I started my medication. Honestly though, until the physical side of anxiety was relieved (and in many cases medication is necessary) I could not start dealing with the emotional side of anxiety. It simply (for me) was impossible to sit in my C's office and try and focus on what was being said when my anxiety was so high I could not breath, see straight and I felt like my heart was going to blow out of my chest. Maybe somebody else could but I could not. Then, I felt so worthless because I could not even function due to the physical side of anxiety I just spiraled further down.
When I was hospitalized I really thought I was having a heart attack. My anxiety and panic had reached a point of physically destroying my body and my lupus just pushed that along. And when you are so riddled with anxiety it physically impairs you medication can be a TERRIFIC tool to stabilize your body so you can get your mind "retrained". They are not "happy pills", they are tools to ease the physical symptoms of anxiety so your mind can do the work.
I sometimes thing.. GOSH, why did I suffer so long? The answer is I don't know. I do know when live in a state of constant anxiety you simply cannot think or process things with rational thought.
