Wow, see, I knew it... hey sounds like it was an emotional eclipse for you..try not to worry, I think things will improve and lighten, its a crisis point. Eclipses can be VERY painful (remember some of our last ones, Sept 2007, your experience 5th August) but they trigger a new course...
Ok, first off.. he's not going anywhere. He's not scared or daunted, or put off by your meltdown. Ok, so he did the man thing, tried to offer solutions, like relax, take a trip etc..men like to 'fix'. Fantastic news that he WILL sort out the emails and you can look at his phone whenever. Sounds like he really heard you?
I know you cant compare bf and Helen BUT.. I too had to cope with finding out he had taken her to meet his Mum, his brother, BMF 1, 2 and 3.. weekends away, photos of them together smiling with the above, holidaying with his family, last night I found out they went to see a film this time last year I wanted to see...etc etc etc.
How did I cope with all that? I just decided to NOT dwell on it, to put it out of my mind, pushed it out of my head. I would ask all the questions, absorb the answers, think about it for a bit and then purposefully kind of take a deep breath and 'blow it out' and .. smile, I would make myself smile (thinking, ok, that hurt... but he's MINE now, not hers).
This is making you ill, tired, depressed even..think of it this way.. if you DID break up now, would you spend time dwelling on these facts? Imagining it? No. So.. why not try and just stop thinking about it!? Sounds easy huh.
On the other point, the lies, deceit, coming over lying to you whilst being in an R with her.. ok, I dont know how you get past that one. Anyone else got any ideas? He had the classic A with all the assiciated selfish deceitful behaviour that entails. What do the books say? (like that one - After the Affair)???
Hey thinking of you sweets xxx
Me:40! H:37 Together: 12yrs IDLY & left 11/07 ADs 03/08 OW 8/08 Reconciled 05/09 now married! my thread
