K4D It's a Wonderful Life

[25yearsmlc]

Y'all that are spending so much time flogging Kevin (crab shack has me feeling salty)... maybe it is time to step back and let things be. J3B has a story where he tried to save someone's life once in a raging sea, but that person just did not take the extra effort when given the assistance. Some people you just cant save. I am reminded of another man named Phil who was lost...

Kerry, can you refresh my memory? I think I recall that guy but last time I checked, if it's the same one, he was sooo "NOT around". (Is he the one who went off the deep end?)
j-

PS But I take your point.

[K4D]

I'm here and so ready to leave. When W comes in the room, I just leave and go into another room. I just don't even want to talk to her.

Kevin

[K4D]

The first thing W's dad said to me when I arrived is how is the single life treating me. I looked at him and said it is what it is. He didn't say anything else about it the rest of the night. Now we are all sitting in the living room. I honestly have nothing to say to W. She will say something to me and I just don't care. I will say that everyone is being friendly. I just don't want to be here. As soon as W starts talking, I just tune her out.

Kevin

[smith18]

Kerry, can you refresh my memory? I think I recall that guy but last time I checked, if it's the same one, he was sooo "NOT around". (Is he the one who went off the deep end?)

I dont think LostPhil went off the deep end - he may have already been there. The similarity was that he would always defend and argue his way to posters instead of actually taking their advice. He had a good chance to save his marriage as his W was not in any A.

[K4D]

Interesting.

Kevin

[K4D]

So I finally ended up leaving last night. The girls wanted to stay the night there so I let them. W's dad ended up being friendly the rest of the night. I told everyone goodbye except W. W came up to me and wanted to talk about exchanging the kids in the morning. They were all going to go to breakfast. I was invited. I said I don't care. We will talk in the morning. Then W offered me cake to take home kind of laughing since there were 2 cakes. I said no thanks and walked out without any further acknowledgement.

So this morning I get out of the shower and there is this loud banging on my door. I am wearing a towel wrapped around. So I go to answer the door and there is W. She wants to drop off the girls. I say ok, leave the door cracked and walk off. Then W and girls come in and W comes over to me and starts talking about their breakfast, etc. I say ok and head into my room. W follows me into my room and continues talking about how the day should go and wanting ideas on what else she can get D8 and who is coming, etc. I'm like ok. So she keeps talking. Keep in mind I am in my towel and in my room. So finally I sit down on the bed and then she starts talking about her job interviews and what she is running into and then wants to offer me any help on questions I might have for a lead I got last night from a recruiter on a BSA position. I tell her I am doing the research to answer the best way. She wanted examples of questions I was getting. I didn't really divulge any. So she keeps on talking. Finally she decides she has to go. By this time I am thinking, I am pretty much ready, all I have to do is drop my towel, a quicky would be a good way to start the day off. But I don't say this.

So she finally starts to head to the door. Looks a bit at my teams business plans we have started since it is in the dining room of my apartment. So I quickly say I am also working on that and we are trying to launch by january 1st 2011. I don't say anything further. Oh and she tells me she has a friend with a lot of money that wants to buy our van from her and donate so she just needs me to sign the title. I say ok. I don't care about the van at this point anymore. She tells me she would like for me and the girls to be at her place by 12:30 so she can dress D8 for her party. That is fine. Then she finally leaves.

So now my girls are getting a shower and I am getting ready and we will be heading out soon to start the full day. It will be a party for D8 and then Joe's crabshack after for dinner for D8. I am guessing it will just be W, my girls and me.

I think last night when W's dad asked me first thing how is the single life, that just kind of set the tone for my mood the rest of the night. What kind of crappy question was that knowing he was an originator of pushing for us to D.

I don't know. I have things I need to accomplish and I don't want W's help in doing it. I want to say I did it on my own. I would like to prove to myself for a change that I can succeed at things without her.

Not that D8 will read this. But...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY D8!!!!

Kevin

[K4D]

Deep down inside I still love W. But I am tired of being around her while she is living another life. I am finding myself not wanting to be around her until she has an interest in us again.

Is that normal?

Kevin

[TrentC]

So this morning I get out of the shower and there is this loud banging on my door. I am wearing a towel wrapped around. So I go to answer the door and there is W. She wants to drop off the girls. I say ok, leave the door cracked and walk off. Then W and girls come in and W comes over to me and starts talking about their breakfast, etc. I say ok and head into my room. W follows me into my room and continues talking about how the day should go and wanting ideas on what else she can get D8 and who is coming, etc. I'm like ok. So she keeps talking. Keep in mind I am in my towel and in my room. So finally I sit down on the bed and then she starts talking about her job interviews and what she is running into and then wants to offer me any help on questions I might have for a lead I got last night from a recruiter on a BSA position. I tell her I am doing the research to answer the best way. She wanted examples of questions I was getting. I didn't really divulge any. So she keeps on talking. Finally she decides she has to go. By this time I am thinking, I am pretty much ready, all I have to do is drop my towel, a quicky would be a good way to start the day off. But I don't say this.

How hard would it have been to say "W, I'm in the middle of getting ready for my day. We can talk later." and show her to the door?

Wait, I forgot who I was talking to.

I wasn't going to comment on the quickie idea, but I have to say: that's really pathetic.

You are the king of passive-aggressiveness. I salute you.

[K4D]

Passive–aggressive behavior (negativistic personality trait) is passive, sometimes obstructionist resistance to following through with expectations in interpersonal or occupational situations.
It is a personality trait marked by a pervasive pattern of negative attitudes and passive, usually disavowed resistance in interpersonal or occupational situations.
It can manifest itself as learned helplessness, procrastination, stubbornness, resentment, sullenness, or deliberate/repeated failure to accomplish requested tasks for which one is (often explicitly) responsible. It is a defense mechanism, and usually only partly conscious.

Thanks TrentC,

Kevin

[K4D]

I wasn't going to comment on the quickie idea, but I have to say: that's really pathetic.

Perhaps I should have said... W, if you are going to keep talking in my bedroom, perhaps I should get something out of this to.



Kevin