Mixed Signals or is this Limbo Land

[Kemper]

MSH,

Let me know if you need any help with D13's computer. It is what I do for a living.

She sounded like she had let me down, or not risen to my expectation, I feel like she is still seeking my approval, leftover issue from marriage. She feels guilty I guess, what do I do or say to her to break this? I don't want her to feel accountable to me anymore, all that does is make her feel I am still controlling her, I stopped all that crap months ago. I know that as long as she feels accountable to me she will resist any feelings of wanting to come back to me.

You don't say or do anything to break this. This isn't an issue for you to "fix". She has to deal with that on her own. If you stopped all that crap months ago then it is up to her to recognize that and deal with it anyway she can or knows how. Don't think about what she may be thinking or doing as it only causes you to question things more. Nobody but her and God knows what is going through her head, you like I are not a mind reader or knows what they are thinking or feeling. It is up to them to tell us if they want us to know. You can't control when or if she comes back.

Continue to focus on yourself, go as dark as you can, keep the conversations short like you did this morning. Live YOUR life and enjoy the time you have with this kids. Don't worry about how she feels, what she is thinking, what she is doing, if she will come back, etc. The decision to come back is up to her and nothing anyone else can control. Just be the best person you can be for YOU and not anyone else. If she likes that person then good if not there are other people that will/do.