Looking for help with WAW

[sandi2]

Until you can prevent yourself from talking about the M even when you accidently run into her in some place......I don't know if GAL or anything else is going to be very productive. That is the most important step and the first step in DBing.....stop talking about the R. IT DOESN'T WORK! IT MAKES MATTERS WORSE! Haven't you seen that by now?

Another thing, you apologized to her at the gym and then you go home and send her another apology through email. Can't you see that as being so cliny & needy? Do you think that is a picture of a strong, self-confident man?

The one thing that I see said over & over in so many LBH's posts are how impatient they are. Some brag about how they've done their 180's for four or five days and think the WAW should be ready to reconcile.

I am not saying that she's justified in having left you or to have an affair or anything else she may up to, but do you think things should be ready to fall back into place just b/c you are impatient and you've "tried" to do a couple of things? Just b/c you love your W and now you're miserable doesn't count for much where she's concerned. What "will" count is for you to get off your butt and stop feeling sorry for yourself--and how bad you been treated, and start cranking out DB techniques. You're still trying to fall back on "talking" to her about the M. So, how's that working for you? Not well, is it? What's it going to take for you to decide to stop the old way and make up your mind to learn a new way and stick to it?

You have lost your W. Your M is dead. Your W is gone. Now, you can cry and be sad and think the worst for the rest of your life....or you can look at the option of DBing.....the correct way.....and build a new R and a new life.