you suggesting that people prone to depression cannot make decent, loving partners??
Of course not ... 1 in 4? I'm surprised it's that low, I would have thought the number might be higher than that. My darling, sucessful, fabulous loving Dad has suffered with depression all his (and our life) and I wouldn't change him for the world ... but my sisters and I have all inherited (genetics or environment? who knows) his illness to different degrees and a parent's health is an imporant consideration in the likely health outcomes for their offspring.
One of my sisters and I have forgiven mum for making such a dodgy choice of partner and co-parent on the basis that she was very young when she chose dad and didn't know anything about depression or mental illness - I suspect she also had low self esteem so thought this almost perfect (but slightly broken) man was a good catch. My other sister ... not so much. She's still pretty cross about what she perceives was a fractured and dysfunctional upbringing, because of dad's sadness and distance and the impact that had on our mum who is such a larger than life, fun, overflowing-with-love woman.
No - I'm not making any comment about your boyfriend's capacity to be a loving, decent partner. What I'm commenting on is your dissatisfaction and gently suggesting you trust yourself to really have a look at it and see what it means.
Ali life doesn't have to be so difficult and so full of angst.
Deepak Chopra, in his book The Ultimate Happiness Prescription says
Quote:
when mind, body and spirit are in harmony, happiness is the natural result. Signs of the absence of harmony on the other hand, are discomfort, pain, depression, anxiety and illness in general. Unhappiness is a form of feedback. It signals that disharmony has entered the field somewhere - either in mind, body or spirit. Awareness has become disconnected. Only when we look at the situation in this holistic way can we link health, wholeness, and holiness, for all three share the same root word, and all three share the same state of harmony or disharmony.
The thing is, when you discribe your uncertainty, it's not all about your boyfriend's depression (even though sometimes it does sound like you blame a lot of your unhappiness on things your boyfriend does or doesn't do - photos of old girlfriend, phone calls to her on your birthday, extended periods of little sexual intimacy... you know by now that no one is responsible for your happiness and comfort but you).
Remember too that what someone does or says to you is their karma. How you react is yours.
Blessings. V
Last edited by Walking; 01/15/1002:45 AM.
V
Never make someone a priority, who makes you an option.
