Separated, new baby, but still hopeful

[newmama]

OK, time for an update...
yesterday was busy with my sister and it is very cool to get to know her as an adult! She is 21; 12 years younger than me!

Anyway, I believe God or my guardian angel was looking out for us yesterday because on the way home, the gas light came on while I was on the freeway. After kicking myself, I thought No big deal, I will use my handy portable GPS to find the nearest gas station. So I started to follow the directions given but couldn't tell the name of the streets so I got turned around. I tried again and in my distracted state ran a red light while oncoming traffic was turning left!!! Luckily the car had just entered the intersection so they could stop in time and I kept going but pulled over to calm myself and say a prayer of thanks!! Whew!

Luckily I was able to drive farther to a gas station I knew and never ran out of gas!

Do you know the crazy thing about this? When I saw the gas light, first thought was "oh crap, I gotta fill up" and the second thought was "WH would be so pissed if he knew I let the tank get this low" WTH? Why was I worried about what HE thought? I think it was because I still want his approval, even more now because I am the mother of his son!!! Later, I told him about the gas light but not about running the red light...

So last night I ended up being exhausted and did not want to work out so I didn't. WH arrived late but told me ahead of time that he had a meeting. Instead of texting, he called to let me know he was on his way. I said goodbye first (for what it's worth!) I made pasta carbonara for dinner, but made too much sauce so the meal was "soppy." WH still had seconds though and was very nice about it.

At one point I was looking for super glue for my nail and he gets up and digs around until he found some for me. Now I was not busy like I had planned, but luckily I was tired so I was naturally and authentically distant!

S ended up taking longer than normal to go to sleep, so WH stayed later but by 8:25 I let him know that I could take it from there.

all right will update about today after I feed S!