You know, the DR book does not support snooping to get information about an A, OM, etc. The book teaches to "outshine" the OM and not become obsessed with what "may" be happening or not. After seeing how quickly you nearly went over the edge when you found your W's call to OM, I'm wondering if that isn't the best route for you. If you can't handle knowing what is said between them or how often they may contact each other.....then you may do better not trying to find solid proof. I am not telling you one way or the other. I'm just offering suggestions b/c you have to do what you can handle. I could see your change come about very rapidly and how your thought process was not clear at all.
I hope you will take all the time you need to think things through very carefully in what you need to do and how to proceed. It is hard for me to see some things go a certain way but that is my way of thinking and doing.....it may not be everyone's. A lot of the men here on the board really push exposure and getting proof of the A, etc. I don't want you to feel pressured from us b/c you need to feel supportfrom us. Okay?
Do things to uplift your spirits and feed your self-esteem while she is gone. Even if you have to take a few days away from the board in order to get your thoughts collected and rest. But....do come back. We would miss you.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
We would miss you.
