Hopeless feelings

[mb28]

Need help on how to handle an upcoming conversation with H tonight.

H informed D9 last night that the house is going up for sale on Monday. Needless to say, she has been very upset and his having a very difficult time with the thought of losing her home. She is already having a hard time with her dad not being home every night for the last 6 weeks and this is adding to her stress. He agreed to come over tonight, so that we can talk about how best to handle this for the kids. By the way, he is the one that wants to sale the house, and I have finally agreed. Currently he is living with his parents, and he wants to the sale the house, so he can afford to get his own place.

I have some ideas as to what I want to say to him tonight about how I think we can make this a little easier on the kids. I have already told him that he will have to carry most of the burden of getting house ready to sale because I’m working full time and going to school full time. And I don’t have any spare time, and the extra time I have I would like to spend with my kids, and not always cleaning the house.

I’m going to propose that H move back home for the duration of the house being up for sale. I will inform him that this will not mean anything about our R. We can live separated under the same roof. I will tell him that we would make it a rule, that there will be no R talk with each other (unless he brings it up, and even then I would keep it short). I want to communicate that this is only to give the kids some security and stability in their lives before the house sales. My biggest worry about suggesting this to him is that he will take this as a ploy on my part to get him back. I’m not very good at communicating, so I desperately need help here. I want to get my point across on how I think this will benefit the kids and us to keep up with the house. As well as be stern, and let him know that I’m not going to carry this burden of selling the house.

Please, please anyone that can offer some advice on how I can approach and handle this conversation in a non controlling way.