No, ya’ll didn’t get rid of me that easy … I wasn’t done randomizing.
Don't let kids trip into things they don't understand; or ask questions of a six year about OM. If you sense it coming, deflect ... for your son and for your better life. Kids get confused and hurt when they feel they've done or said something wrong, as if they are the reason for all this trouble. It all comes unintentionally crashing down on them unless you remain vigilant. If you care about them the way you should and say you do, protect them in what you discuss.
Mine are grown, sort of, but when one went through a hard breakup and we discussed meaning of life stuff, I recommended that when he speaks of her around friends, if he has nothing good to say ... you know the rest. I don't mention their mom to them and quickly move away from any of their comments on the subject. Earned that right the hard way, and I have boundaries to protect me, and boundaries to protect my sons. Set boundaries for your better life, and as a father.
If they mention new Legos ask them their favorite color. Take it away from who was there. Man, have you seen the web site about the people of Walmart? You don't want to know who was there, only that he got home ok. The OM is just someone who bought plastic distractions in hopes it will matter one day when his true character can't hide in the toy aisle at Walmart.
Detaching is for your survival, not to manipulate aliens. It is an insulator against all the poison of MLC, while you work on becoming your better person. It eventually becomes second nature until you realize you aren't even doing it most days. It just happens, and it frees you. So does potato. When you hear garbage spewing forth, think potato. Why not? Makes just as much sense. My son used that answer on test questions he wasn't ready for. Teacher wrote him a thank you for making her laugh while everyone else tried making her stupid with bull.
Your professional identity. I read about the trauma often associated with retirement. A person at the top of their career, say a doctor, retires. A person who was defined by what they did, suddenly feel a total loss of identity. You never retire from being a dad, the pay suxx but the work is great. What you do at work is not who you are. A man should learn to be content with what he has, but never with what he is. We can always become better dads, better men, and better partners to someone else. Unless of course it involves zombies.
Stop trying to say or do things with calculated thoughts of how they might affect her. They won't and you won't. You will affect yourself, and get over caring if she notices. If she does, you'll find out. Only she'll be more angry than happy that you are a better person now, why not back whenever the hellll she says you should have been. Alien excuses and lies. Her loss. Learn it. Live it.
Timelines. Aliens don't tell time. They stop it. They wind it backwards. They rewind it to stay 17 yrs old forever. You got one timeline. The one you use to plan changes and become your best self and the best dad. How long is your timeline, and what are you going to do to stay on task?
Done randomizing - enough aliens - and zombies. Just some thoughts your posts brought to what's left of my mind, my part of the settlement. Hang in there Bradley, you are going to be the best.
