Thank you for stopping by my thread. I had read yours as well, and like you, I feel like I have a lot of things to say to you. We're dual military, 3 kids, and I understand about schools and separation and that the military doesn't ever have the best interests of its soldiers/sailors in mind when it comes to those sort of things.
Also like you, I need to sort out what I'd like to say, and I'm at work, so it'll have to wait a bit.
In short, I'm happy for your progress, I think the move is a good thing, remember that not all stress comes from bad things, and therefore not all stress is negative. Moving is a BIG deal. I REALLY think you need to set a boundary with H about OM and A. I didn't, and I regret it terribly. W sort of came out of A on her own, I guess, although OM lingers in the background for her (he's moved on, I think, and until I set the boundary, she was still deriving some emotional comfort from occasionally reaching out to him via email) Once the boundary was set, I felt 100% better about myself, although you HAVE to be ready to go through with the consequences, which is really f'ing scary.
I appreciate the discussion a page or two back about being the better option vs doing things that seem mean. Trust me, your H knows how you feel, and being kind and courteous without pursuing is the way to go (although it really sucks sometimes). I've finally realized that I'm worth having, and truly believing it (and therefore acting that way), and I can see that that is very attractive to my W. Sigh. Why did it take 40 years to learn that?
There's probably more, and I'm sorry for being sorta shotgun all over the place, but know that you'll be ok, even if sometimes it doesnt feel that way. You've tackled some serious issues (bipolar, communication, A, etc) and it takes awhile sometimes for the dust to settle. I'll be back around, and maybe even answer some of your Q's over on my thread. Hang in there.
