Not pursuing, but what I have done every weekend and she would do the same
Yes it is! You are finding excuses to contact her.
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So I tell her I'll take them to McDonalds to play.
You are rescuing your W. She needs to be forced into her role of responsibility of a parent. You are covering for her.
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This is also one of the first times in a long time where I created a situation where she could make contact with OM and I didn't even think about it or worry about it
A good sign of growth for you.
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Something is going on in her brain, don't have a clue what. She never used to be so impatient, she never used to get so upset so quickly when the kids were being kids, and she never used to spend so little time with them.
That happens when a person is living a double life.
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I fully now realize there is nothing I can do, but make sure I am filling in for the kids and they see no gap in attention and love.
I hope you really do realize that. As long as you do what a father needs to do with his kids and give them all the love and attention that you can, that's great. Just don't do it by way of rescuing her. Do you see the difference? Maybe you were not rescuing her when you took them to McDonalds, but it looked that way to me. Any time something is suppose to be her responsibility--and you do it her, then it rescues her from her problems.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
