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Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 28
J
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J
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Posts: 28
Kinda stuck in limboland and not sure what to really do.
Spouse had an A with a coworker. After one false R that lasted several months, finally got fed up and was going to leave. After a weekend at home to gather myself, was going to file. That weekend, W came over and asked me to reconcile. This was after I'd exposed the A and OM got in trouble. A couple of weeks later when I discussed it with her, she said she was unsure. I then went dark for a month or so. I moved away and things somewhat changed. She added me as a friend on social networking page and I get text messages from her a few times a week.
We still share a piece of property, so she will sometimes contact me about it's upkeep. I have not brooched the marriage issue in several months. I don't get the impression she wants to do it, but I think she's comfortable with things the way they are. As for me, I am patiently waiting on things. However, I have found myself talking to several women casually.
Any suggestions on how to proceed with the wife? And what do I tell anybody else?

Joined: May 2007
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When she originally brought up "trying to reconcile", how did she approach it? Did she suggest anything specific, as to what that would look like?


My current status: june 2006. Wife ran out and filed D.
Finalized Jan 11, 2010, after 12.5 years M.
3 wonderful sons caught in the middle


Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 28
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No, she didn't, she just indicated that she wanted to. It was a pretty random night cause I tried to kick her out and she wouldn't leave. I think she was having a bit of a meltdown. I believe that evening was perfect storm of the following
1. That was the first weekend she'd been alone previous weekends either I was there, a friend was there, or she went out of town.
2. She thought I was moving in the next few days and hadn't told her.
3. She got in trouble at work b/c of the A.
4. The OM was threatened with termination because of it and they couldn't see each other.
I didn't buy it and waited a week for it to calm down, at which point she became indecisive again. Have not brought the issue up since then. I then went back to NC and that lasted until December when she added me on social networking. Since then I get periodic texts from her, either about the house (on the market) or the dog. Usually at a rate of a couple per day. Not sure if this is business or her using business as an excuse to keep in contact with me.


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