One thing you haven't realized is that A's don't acknowledge a conscience. My RAH told me that he often knows when he is doing wrong but chooses to not think about it b/c he can't handle it. Keep that in mind.
I didn't feel like the bad kid that was in trouble yesterday! I knew I didn't do anything wrong..exh was wrong and just lashing out. I held myself together. I was going to ingore, but then thought I wanted him to know I can stand up to him and his horrible way of treating people and be ok.
So in the afternoon I was leaving my house and OW (original #1) was leaving hers at the same time. She motioned for me to pull over. She said that she has NEVER returned one text to exh and he has sent her texts maybe once a month for the past few months saying Hi. Yesterday he sends her a nasty text saying he thought she was better than that than to shi* talk him. She had no idea where that came from. I explained what I knew about MGF and how OW's conversation with MGF's husband must have gotten back to exh. Hard to follow I know, but my point is exh was caught,he doesn't like people talking bad about him and he was pissed.
He is supposed to come today. I feel fine and not anxious at all. He hasn't seen her in a week!
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
SO2, so glad that you didn't feel bad or guilty - that is a big step.
Now, WHY are you talking to these women?! You don't have to be rude, but it might be best to just stay away from them...remember that they had similar morals to your ex - they are NOT your friends!
SO2, so glad that you didn't feel bad or guilty - that is a big step.
Now, WHY are you talking to these women?! You don't have to be rude, but it might be best to just stay away from them...remember that they had similar morals to your ex - they are NOT your friends!
I don't talk to MGF anymore. She contacted me right before Xmas. I wasn't going to say much, but then I thought my silence was defending exh's bad stuff. She was looking for some answered questions about stuff he told her and did. I answered her questions but not much more. We haven't spoken for a few weeks now.
OW lives up the street from me. I have no issues with her anymore. Yes, she played her part but she did apologize to me and was lied to as well. No, I don't forget what she has done and we aren't buddies, but I do forgive her. We don't really talk anymore, but see eachother around due to the small town stuff and my son's friend.
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
I was just thinking after I posted above about how OW or even MGF don't really bug me that much anymore. It really used to at the time. During exh's and OW's affair, I thought if she would just get out of the picture life would be great with exh...WRONG!
Now, I think I realize that OW can be any female in exh's life. Meaning, it wasn't really OW that was special. He didn't really love and care for her either. He didn't choose her over me. Same goes for MGF. Exh has huge issues. If it wasn't that particular OW or MGF or only the Lord knows what other women...it would have been someone else. Its not like he looked at OW when we were together and went "that is the woman of my dreams." Make sense?
I think that is how I have been able to let go of my hatred for OW like I used to have. It has nothing to do with me, OW, MGF or anyone else except Exh's warped mind.
Last edited by Startingover2; 01/11/1007:42 PM.
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
I would just be very careful with "gossiping" about your x, or comparing notes. What is the purpose? I just don't want you to get stuck again...
I have a friend who tends to try to do the same thing - she lives for the gossip, I think. We don't talk as much, anymore. She brings up ex and what she knows about his life in every conversation. I'm not interested in knowing.
Sooooo here i sit. Waiting for exh to send a text, call, send up a smoke signal; something to let me know if he is coming today or not. If hes coming great, if not I want to go to a kickboxing class. But if I ask if he is coming or not he will either get snippy and say its his time or tell me to go ahead and go, but then say I cancelled. Its a no win situation with him....
So here i sit!
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
You're doing it again.....who cares if he gets snippy? You have things to do. Text and ask so you can go on with your life. You DON'T have to share with him why you are asking. If he questions you, just tell him that you need to know the schedule for tonight. Good luck....hope you make it to kickboxing!
Ok...text sent: "Hey..what is the schedule for tonight?"
Awaiting a response...
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
