City girl, No they are not solutions based, they believe fix the individual then fix the marriage, I have told my IC that I believe they did the counseling all wrong and told him that. I have not seen him in over a month but there again I am in a much better place and he agrees that I do not need further IC. My W is a messed up person and at least she is in C but I can't imagine what is going on b/c she is reverting back to old ways.
TrentC, At the time of the session I did not know she was lying. She was very convincing she said, to me "I am your wife, you are my husband , we are still married" that was the phase for her on the M where she said "If I had to make a decision today its over but lets put in God's hands". I found out about #2 A on Oct. 30. As far as her beliefs go she used to be a strong christian woman, now she is doing whatever makes her happy with no regard to anyone else. Super selfish.
I would like to say to her that don't you think you have a better chance of finding true happiness with me or at least trying with me then trying to find someone else out there with as much baggage as you have at this point in life (age 42), what do you have to lose. I don't want to guilt her into anything. I have basically told her that I can forgive the infidelity and not hold it against her in the future.
Formerly "missherlove"
Me49 XW49 M17 T19 S16 D20
Expose yourself to your deepest fear; after that, fear has no power, and the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes. You are free.
