feel like I am dying inside...

[BeABetterMe4Us]

I am not sure that I feel very positive about anything. I am a mess. I feel like I am going to throw up 24/7.

I don't want to be like this. I want to be happy. I want to be in control of MYSELF! But I am not. My hands shake all the time. I feel physically ill.

When I ask him what his needs are he says he just wants me to be nice to him. I screwed up and was not nice (blaming him for my unhappiness) for so long...I certainly understand this need.

I want my life and marriage back.