Right. More good practice today. H, S, and I hung out, did things together. I tried very hard to keep my calm. I noticed it really made a difference. A few times, H again lost his cool, let's say. I did not take it personally, I stayed calm, and noticed he calmed right down after me every time. Throughout the day, I noticed he got more relaxed too.
H is quite the Felix Unger to my Oscar Madison, and at his worse can be cruel, barking orders around cleaning. H even lost it over a drip of soda in the car today. But by the end of the day, we were all enjoying shelling peanuts and eating them in the car. I was careful to shell over a bag so as not to dirty "Felix's" car - and guess who was dropping shells everywhere as he tore into them?! My H - laughed that he got a "new brain" where he doesn't care about stuff like that and he's more Zen. We both laughed and it felt good that at some level, he knows and is working on himself too. All without me confronting him, but by taking care of myself and being centered din my responses to him.
Feeling good. This is coming as a result of me working on calming my own panic and enjoying Me time instead of obssessing on how to please H so I can get him back. Thank you LR and all of you - I could NOT DO THIS WITHOUT YOU!
