"TALK" to OP? Oh, you wouldn't believe what I would like to do to him. Then again, it was good motivation for me to break a few personal weight records at the gym not to mention my Muay Thai class. Even today, I don't think either he or I would like to meet each other alone anywhere. I'm not _that_ sure of my self-control and knowledge I don't need to break a sweat to break him in 2. Better not to tempt fate .
Having said that, and this is for some of you who responded to Rocked, don't backslide into making excuses for your spouse. OP was only as damaging to your M and you as your spouse permitted him/her to be, or (as much as it hurts) as your spouse PURSUED and PERSUADED him/her to be. Just as some LBS get caught in their own fog in begging, pleading, whining etc before DB-ing, a WAS that shows remorse and reconciliation often triggers another fog (albiet a different one) in the LBS, where the OP is demonized and the ex-LBS goes through mood and perception swings towards ex-WAS.
If you think you could never cheat, or that you're intrinsically superior to OP - I say "Never say never". Many "reformed" OPs and WASs would have sworn they could never have seen themselves in that situation. And they look back "after" and can't believe what they did either.
Personally, I've walked on lines and through areas I never thought possible myself. And while I have no doubt of OM as scum and a predator, that does not blind me to certain other realities.
Me 42 W 39 Married: 11 Jan 1998, T: Since 1992 First Bomb: Sep 2007 Confirmed A/OM: 4 Nov 2007 Kids: D10, S5 Reconciled and together again after (alot of) time and heartbreak. 3rd kid, S, born 2 Jan 2010.
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