Sometimes it's not about "looking strong". It's about "being strong". Being strong means that you act authentically regarding things that are meaningful to you. If your ring is meaningful to you as a representation of your vows and your marriage and you haven't given up on that yet .... keep wearing it. Then your actions will be congruent with your convictions, and that shows. Without words. In your general energy and demeanor.
OTOH, if you allow yourself to get tangled up in endless knots of, "What will she think if I do this?......", and allow those speculations to drive your actions, that will show too. IMHO.
You said something earlier about not wanting to be the bad guy and hurt her. Understandable. But every day that she continues her affair, she is hurting *herself* badly, especially if she's "not that kind of person", at her core. And you know that and are allowing it to continue.
You're not responsible for her terrible choices, but in some degree, silence does give consent. I understand the wisdom of waiting for clarity and calmness to confront. But when that has been achieved, and still you keep discovering new relatively passive workarounds to try to derail the affair, anything to avoid exposure and/or confronting her directly and decisively with what you know ... why???
