Snow here last 3 days; snow is rare for us where I live. Temps around 0 or below. Lots of folks snowed in.
Friend call and his girlfriends parents were snowed in some 50 miles away on their farm. Friends GF was there and got stuck. She needed to go get parents meds and J-mans car could not make it thru the snow. He called and asked me to drive him in 4 wheel drive, so I went.
Left out @ 9 am. Got there, it was rough, went shopping and ate out in small mom and pops... LOVED IT and this spot will become my new fav....
Afterwards, stopped in to see an old friend on way home, he is in his 60's and just have not taken the time to see because so far away. Enjoyed that.
Then phone rang. Another old friend, she wanted to know if I'd like to go to other mutual friends and have dinner and Wii bowl all night.... normally this would have been a "no", but 180'ed it and went. Had a blast and won a prize for the Wii bowl tourney. Which was 1 roll of toilet paper, small bottle of mouthwash, and some kleenex.
Long ride home @ midnight on snow covered roads...
Slept like a baby, got up, went to church and now home getting ready to want movie with high school pal that was passing thru town. Stopped in to spend the afternoon catching up....
Ok then, I will get back...
Love for all here, God Bless!
Me 43 / W 40 T 29 / M 15 S-18 11/4/09-ILYBINILWY 11/10/09-Separated 12/1/09-W admitted EA 12/5/09-W admitted PA 12/24/09 W say "I love you"
"A GOOD MARRIAGE IS NOT ONE WHERE PERFECTION REIGNS"
W called today. I knew it was her before I answered. I am the WAS now, and stuck to script. I did not use her name when I answered. I just said "hello".
She asked a lot of Q's. I answered some with only 1 word.... Things like busy, out, fine, living, working etc.... only length was about taxes and our dog who is sick. Then I said, look, I am busy. gotta run! And hung up.
10 minutes later I got text that said:
May I ask what u were doing when you rushed me off the phone?
I did not answer back.
5 mins after that:
You couldn't speak? Normally, you talk forever.
Should I answer her back. This is the first time we have spoke in a while. I handle the phone call perfectly.
She has not texted back again yet....
What should I do.
This is the first time she has started to wonder about me....
Help!
Me 43 / W 40 T 29 / M 15 S-18 11/4/09-ILYBINILWY 11/10/09-Separated 12/1/09-W admitted EA 12/5/09-W admitted PA 12/24/09 W say "I love you"
"A GOOD MARRIAGE IS NOT ONE WHERE PERFECTION REIGNS"
Hi Pat, I've been away from the board a few days, but just caught up on your thread.
Quote:
Have not thought about W in 2 days....
Are you serious? Wow! Yes....that is detaching!
Quote:
She asked a lot of Q's. I answered some with only 1 word.... Things like busy, out, fine, living, working etc.... only length was about taxes and our dog who is sick. Then I said, look, I am busy. gotta run! And hung up.
10 minutes later I got text that said:
I love it!!
Quote:
Should I answer her back. This is the first time we have spoke in a while. I handle the phone call perfectly.
Yes you did handle it perfectly!
What if you were in the shower...or doing something else where you didn't have your cell glued to your side?
I vote to let her do the sweating for a while! She is having an open A and flashing it without shame. You don't owe her a TM right away. Make her wait.......and wonder. See how just one phone call got her curiosity up?
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
Oh, and Pat.....continue to be a man of mystery and don't give her the satisfaction of telling her that you weren't doing anything special. The very idea of her wanting to know why you were in a rush to get off the phone with her! That is none of her business.
Anyway, think of a good response to have in your back pocket if and when you happen to talk to her in the future.
I am so proud of you! Acting as if "you" are the WAS is a good way to get her attention. It is a good way to detach & GAL.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
Pat - wow that is awesome. I am envious, that's what I need. I'm going to steal a second on your thread here. I kind of like the idea of acting as if you are the "WAS" I'm wondering if I could pull it off because I am struggling with detaching and need to so badly. Any advice, how'd you go about it, tips, anything?
I am proud of you, you are someone to look up to right now for me.
M39 W41 Two children WAW bomb dropped 11/7/09 Piecing Aug 10 - Nov 10 No longer piecing...Nov 10 Separation Jan 11 EA ends again Feb 11 Piecing attempt #2, Mar 11
I have been doing everything you have told me to do. Thank you soooooo much! I have been feeling great and missing you very very much.
I also, have been away from the board a lot. I had to get out of the house... You know, cabin fever setting in...
I just left for a few days. Grabbed the gun (ya knmow, in case of bears.....), jumped in the 4 by 4 and camped in the hills for a while.
Forgot the fishing pole last week... I don't know it there were folks that lived close to where I was at, but I do know the fish weren't too damm happy.... BANG, BANG, BANG!
There was a Mickey D's several miles down the road, so it wasn't really camping....Just getting out.
I will not respond to her.... I will let her sweat!
I love you Sandi... Glad your back.
I pray your health is on an upward swing, and that was not what kept you away!
Me 43 / W 40 T 29 / M 15 S-18 11/4/09-ILYBINILWY 11/10/09-Separated 12/1/09-W admitted EA 12/5/09-W admitted PA 12/24/09 W say "I love you"
"A GOOD MARRIAGE IS NOT ONE WHERE PERFECTION REIGNS"
Wow! Yes....that is detaching!
That is none of her business.