If it makes you feel better to act with love and friendship then I think you should continue that. However, if it ever comes down to it and you really need to let go, friendship may not be an option, as least until the pain is more manageable. I know others will disagree with me on this point.
Her D requests are BS!! You have a right for joint custody just as much as she does. She is the one asking for the D, why should you have to pay for it? If you can, you two really need to sit down and try to work through this and come up with an agreement together.
Do not cancel the MC!! If she is willing to go, use it as an oppurtunity to show her you understand her perspective on things. She will likley throw out some reasons why the M is not good or maybe even a couple of character flaws about you. Take them in stride and again, demonstrate you understand. Try not to get to defensive. This is where you want to show her that you want her but that you do not need her. I would not directly bring up that her actions are hurting the family. She probabaly already knows this and making her feel guilty about it may put her in a bad place. However, if it were me, I would bring up the infidelity issue in a respectuful manner and let the MC guide you through the discussion.
