Hey SD. There is a volcano here, Mt. St. Augustine, it is pretty regularly having minor eruptions. Tiny earthquakes accompanied by emissions of steam and ash. The thing is, these tiny non-consequential eruptions let off pressure and avoid a catastrophic eruption. These huge eruptions still happen sometimes, air traffic is disrupted, ash falls, the whole place looks like a moonscape, and you have to rinse your car off before you go anywhere, but everything is fine. After an Act of God, everything is fine.
So, the moral of my story is, let yourself vent, or have tiny eruptions. Let yourself experience your emotions, write about them here, but make no mistake, they are your emotions. You are in control of them, not her, not the OM, not anyone but you. And if you happen to have a catastrophic eruption, forgive yourself for it and know that everything will still be fine.
What are you going to do to stop the volcano? Nothing, you cant control that! You are instead going to accept it and prepare for it, and do what you can to protect yourself and your emotions from the fallout. So you know that your weekends are tough- plan for it. Make sure that you dont have time to feel suffocated by your situation. Keep busy and focus on improving yourself rather than wallowing!
SD, You are an excellent man, and you are going to be just fine through this, but I really hope that you feel better than your messages are conveying. What have you done to make yourself feel good today?
I guess I gave the wrong finger to the wrong man...
