You are 100% spot on. When I pulled away and went dark for four days she panicked and came running saying it is over because you don't love me. Abandonment is huge for her. She is also terrified of me finding a better woman and is jealous. Has even stated lately that she is a worthless woman and horrible wife.
I tried the jealousy thing hoping that it would make me more desirable to her and it worked some until I tried it with the long term female friend that she felt threatened by. Then abondonment and rejection issues started.
I believe still that she is a good woman at her core and until A she was an excellent wife (not great house keeper but perfect every other way). She was faithful for 13 years.
I have told her that the A is a mistake but does not undo 13 years worth of good. She is still a good woman. I just want the affair to stop.
I am here for the long haul and need help formulating a plan to get back on track.
She is starting IC and I have been in for about two weeks with my IC.
I want her to be mentally healthy for her and I need to fix me for me and my kids.
Also she had one ovary removed in June because of continual cysts. She is now surgically sterile and had trouble with turning 32. She changed hair style, hair color, dropped ties with her family (finally starting to reach back out some), dropped old friends (reaching out some). With all of this MC has said that she does not think MLC. I hope MC is right but we have only been to three appointments so far.
Help me formulate this plan Gnosis. Help from sandy and or greek would be good too.
Me 33 WAW 32 S12 S4 S2 M12 T14 Not wanting to ever give up.
