Of course your W doesn't want to get attnys involved! LOL! Decline her offer to settle amongst the two of you, call an attny and tell her any future discussion regarding the divorce/settlement should be directed to your attny.
I have SLE and that was one of my H's "reasons". His words "I did not sign up to be married to somebody who got Lupus".
If your W finds a man who is cheating on his W that has a horrid disease attractive then they deserve one another. However, that does NOT mean you have to adhere to her desire to "settle things w/o attnys". Affairs do not require the "cheated on" to settle things in the manner in which the cheater demands.
No further discussion with her about legalities. NONE. She has made her choice, must face the consequences (one being you will not work with her directly to settle anything) and let her be on her way. Maybe one day she will be diagnosed with a disease and and OM will tell her the same thing he told his ill wife "I did not order this disease so see ya!"
I understand attny's are expensive and each state has their own set of laws but I am stunned on a daily basis when one spouse bows down to the cheating spouse to "get things done" without attnys. Divorce requires attnys. If you want to get divorced then you will accept you will have no futher direct contact with me regarding a settlement. PERIOD.
