H has decided he is moving out next week and wants to wait to tell DD until that day. Obviously, that is not the best way to handle it. She is already noticing that he is sleeping on the couch, at his brothers, etc. I think it's time, but I also think I want to tell her that daddy is staying at brothers for a while, nothing permanent, because I just don't think a 4 year old can grasp permanancy, especially when there's no talk of where he will permanently live.
C basically said that we need to talk and communicate, and resolve whatever issues we have because if we don't they will just follow us to our next relationships. (C didn't know that he is already in one) She was point on in everything she said and validated a lot of what I thought. However, I don't think H thought to highly of it, because it was a lot of "you need to put your egos aside and step into each other's shoes". At one point, she told him he needs to live in the same town or near the same town as us for DD's sake. I emailed him to find out when he would like to discuss what we will say to DD and when, and told him I was hoping he heard what the C said, he replied and said "I heard what she said." Not sure what that meant.
I am going back to C this week for myself unless he chooses to join me which I highly doubt. At the end, she said "you 2 have to talk. You can't even look at each other right now and that needs to stop". She didn't mess around! H got in his car when it was over and drove away. not a word. I'm hoping some of it sunk in at least for DD's sake, if not for our own mental well being and mental/physical health, because being this angry is not good for anyone's well being.
PS- I did clean out my dresser and emptied his into bags. I'm also painting the basement next weekend after he leaves, since that was the one room he painted in his team colors. I've also invited a lot of good friends and their children over next Saturday after he leaves for good so we are celebrating, rather than sitting home and feeling sorry for myself. I am definately working on me.
