Still Wondering How To Handle Things!!

[Sanderika]

Hi kissak,

I am glad you quickly shredded the writing. It is not relevant to the situation anymore. That is now past. Some women would have mentioned it to their H. That would have been a mistake for sure.

I think to move forward with H you need to put the wrongs well behind you.

It's all about having lived through this experience in he!! and learning from it to be able to embrace the current and future.

Leaving the past in the past except for the lessons learned is great advice right now. Embrace the current. Maintain your current attitude with H. Think of the future and move forward.

My advice is to find the place where you are relaxed with H about what is happening now. He needs to feel forgiveness and unconditional love to move forward with you. He needs to feel he CAN come back and there will be no grudges and throw-backs.

Another thing is to be able to trust your H. This will be slow in coming. It will take time and only with positive action and reinforcement from H will it occur. In the meantime, I think it is very fair that you keep some guard up and walk the path with him lightly. I hear your fears and hesitation about H's current actions. You are entitled. He has not yet earned full trust or relaxation from you about this relationship. My guess is you know him well enough to recognize his behavior as genuine or not. I think he knows the pain he has caused to his family and is sorry for it.

As they say, Time and Patience.....you are doing everything right. Maintain.....

My thoughts are with you, take care...

Sanderika