Can one use the infidelity in another country as a flight risk when it comes to custody, if not for the purposes of D?
I am assuming that will be all I need to prevent her from ever taking our minor children out of the country.
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OMG Future, I hope it doesn't come to this, but it seems your WAW is bent on going through with this. One would think she would hesitate after having gone through it before. Just know that you didn't do anything to deserve being betrayed like this. It's not your fault. Yes, you might've been a better H, but we are all imperfect. I bet she could've been a better W, but did you turn to someone else to get your jollies? No! It is just the way she is, it seems. If things aren't going her way, she finds someone else. But, now there are children involved, so she should've tried harder to find a way to improve the M, and one thing would've been to make you see how serious she was before she withdrew her affection.
She did seem to be hesitating last fall. She was seriously wavering, and I was trying to be strong, but also offer her a path back. I thought for sure I was riding the line just right. I offered her my sympathy, as in "I can imagine what this must be like for you emotionally." I tried not to put on serious pressure, as in "Reconciliation is way too big of a word for what I want right now, but I'd like for us to spend some time together to see how it feels." She eventually said she would like us to spend time together, but when I laid down my boundary that there can't be a third party involved, that's when she got all strange on me, and things degraded. I really thought she was returning to normal, and that I could see in her the W I knew. I guess not.
I know we both could have been much better spouses to each other. I expressed to her my regret and sorrow for my failings in our M. She seemed to accept that from me. She in turn expressed to me her regret over her failings. I was floored, and that was what got me to lower my guard.
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But, I am in no better sitch, after 5 years trying to make my H see after our so-called reconciliation. I think in his case, he just never regained his love for me, just whiteknuckling for the sake of the children, and I don't want that, and nor would you. It's no way to live.
I'm sorry you are going through this. To my W's credit, last fall she did express to me her fear that that is exactly what would happen with us. I tried to just validate her fear, and give her a no pressure option to take.
