Lying about feelings drags you to their level?

[TrentC]

Trent, I don't think she can admit it yet. I think she is a trainwreck of emotions. Like the analogy I gave earlier.
It's like touching a hot stove- you don't even think you just react quickly. All you can think of is getting away from the pain.

But she is adamant about being 100% truthful about her feelings. She feels betrayed because her husband had been cooling off towards her, and cheated on her.

So, I'm holding her to her own standards. She says she's done? I believe that she's done; otherwise, she is being dishonest -- how can I ever believe what she has to say ever again?

She can't have it both ways. Either people must be truthful with their spouses 100% of the time -- an impossible expectation, by the way, that may have directly contributed to this situation -- or they can hold back parts of themselves and have seemingly contradictory emotional states.