feel like giving up - talk to me!

[Gnosis]

I wish had as much hope but I just don't know.

We'll hope for you then.

I know the back and forth stuff is textbook but it's awful and I don't know how much more I can take.

You know it's textbook. You can take more than you know. The key to being able to do it successfully is to detach your reactions from your emotions (difficult I know.)

I will do my damndest to stay consistent.

Make sure its a "good behavior" consistent. Maintain your boundaries.

This sucks a**

Nobody has denied this.

Luv, I know you probably better than the rest of the people on this thread. So I'm telling you... I know you can do this... use that mule-headedness of yours for good. Change that mindset from one of beaten down negativity to a more positive one. This will become easier once you make up your mind on EXACTLY what it is you want, draw up your plan on what you're going to do to get it and then WORK THE PLAN.

I KNOW YOU CAN DO THIS!

Reminder: Three things.