Mo3,

The "advice" may be on the face of it conflicting but on a second look not necessarily so.

Obviously you will not engage in pursuing behavior but I think that there is a lot of scope for positive action without being pursuing. What I meant to convey is that you should not project a cold or uptight attitude if you happened to be projecting such but instead seek to be upbeat, positive, looking good, smelling great. Not FOR HIM, as we all know that you will do these things anyhow but I thought that you could capitalize on the moment by doing these things in his presence.

The fact is that someone has to strike up a conversation at some point and if you are the one who wants to save the M perhaps there is a way that you can do that without pursuing and without losing ground. I don't think it is the end of the world if you ask how are you doing and the other person responds in one word or not at all. IMHO you lose no ground and you let it go. If you repeatedly do it and hang around like a lap dog then you will look pathetic. But that is IMHO.

It comes down to the implementation of the approach. Crying, begging, wringing hands = pursuing. How ya doin generally does not.

Having said all that the fact is that no two siches are exactly alike and they have not all progressed to the same stage. At the end of the day you look at all the options and decide what works for you.

I have rambled enough on your thread so I will now go and ramble on mine. laugh Please let us know how tonight goes.

Can't keep a good woman down