First Piecing Thread

[Hope4us]

Ok guys. I disagree with you, but I'll trust your judgement.

Kat, It seemed like last night she had decided it needed to be done. That's why I even brought the subject up. Honestly, the way she said it, it was almost like she wanted me to say something.

Puppy, What has changed is that she's pretty darn fog free and is seeing clearly and for her to respond like that during our discussion kind of leads me to believe she's truly taking responsibility for her actions and if an apology to OMW is something that she agrees needs to be done, then why not in the course of "our" discussions, simply ask her IF she'd ever considered sending OMW that apology? Given that, I don't see it as trying to fix her, but help her with deal with that guilt that she still struggles with.

Again, I never said I was going to force her to do it. I was just going to bring it up in conversation and let the convo go from there.

For me, it's enough that she responded the way she did. But I can see a huge benefit in her writing an apology, even if she doesn't send it, to help in forgiving herself.

I posted this before, but when we were in Fla in Nov, I asked her if she'd forgiven herself and she said she thought she had, but when I bring it up, she thinks maybe she hasn't. That kind of tells me that if she doesn't think about it, she doesn't think about it so if there's something that brings some of that stuff out and gets her to really think about it, then why not? And if writing an apology letter, even without sending it, helps her in that regard, why not?

One other interesting thing from last night. We were talking to the bartender. She's a nice woman, 21 yrs old. She was telling us about this guy she'd gone out with a couple times and she found out he's married. This guy told her he'd been separated for a couple years but couldn't afford a D. His wife and kids are living in Fla and he was in Ohio because he's moving here and starting his life over. The bartender said she was ok with dating him if he'd been separated for 2 years and was going to D, but then she learned that he recently went to see his kids and stayed with his W (but I'm sleeping on the couch) and then the dik admitted he'd slept with his wife while he was home. So the bartender said "uh...we're done, I'm not dating a married man" and my W said "DON'T GO THERE, YOU DESERVE SO MUCH MORE"! Wow. Oh how the times have changed.

Given that conversation and the comments about an apology, I just thought maybe it would be a good thing to discuss.

Go ahead, rip away.