First Piecing Thread

[Hope4us]

Thanks Rocked. I think you and Pearl are right on the money. We've been thru the worst thing that can happen to a person and NOW we know how to handle it. And I think that probably will make us a better partner for our spouses because now that we know what they're capable of, we won't take them for granted. And if our spouses have truly learned anything, they won't let themselves go there again. And if they do....

Ok everyone, need some advise.

I've asked this question before and everyone felt pretty strongly one way, but there's been a little change in the circumstances, so I'd like to ask it again.

A number of months ago, I brought up the subject of the wayward spouse apologizing to the spouse of the OP. I felt like (and still do) that it should happen. To me, that would be the ultimate proof that the wayward spouse "gets it". Most people on DB blasted me saying that it sounded like I wanted W to apologize to make ME feel better or something along those lines. So I dropped the idea of bringing it up with W.

Well....last night W and I were having dinner at our bar/grill and there was a news report on the big screen about Tiger Woods and more of the crap coming out about him and his women (how many we up to now?). We started discussing a show we had watched Tues night about the whole Tiger mess. During that show, they interviewed one of his harem. I won't go into the whole conversation, but at one point in the interview, the news person asked the girl (and yes she was a girl, not a woman) if she felt like she owed Tiger's wife an apology. My W was out of the room at that time, so last night when we were talking about it, I told her that part and W said "HE** yes she does!" I didn't say anything because I wasn't exactly sure how or what to say, but now that I've thought about it some more, I have two thoughts and want your opinions.

First thought is I ask W if she'd ever considered sending OMW an apology note. Heck, I don't know, maybe she already did but just didn't tell me about it. If she thinks it's a good idea, encourage her to do it.

Second thought is I ask the same question and if W thinks it's a good idea, tell W to write it out but not send it. Kind of a way to cleanse the soul.

This far post A, I'm not sure what she'd be apologizing for. To make herself feel better or because she truly is remorseful for what she did to OMW. And does that just open a wound in OMW? Would she be looking for forgiveness from OMW when I will NEVER forgive OM and W might be disappointed in the response?I know I have no desire to hear from OM, even though he does owe me an apology. If he did I'd probably say/do some things I really don't want to. What happens if W sends the apology to OMW and the next time she talks to OM, she tells him and that triggers him to contact W?

I've got a whole bunch more thoughts, but I want yours. I am kind of leaning towards the second one, let her get her feelings out, but not send it.

BTW...we had a great night. I got to fall asleep with a hot woman in my arms and there wasn't even any And it was the best feeling ever.

Ok, Opinions?