OH I know... been there, done that... excruciating. BUT... I agree with the others that her behavior towards you recently is a really good sign.
My H has told me now that we are piecing things back together and he has re-committed to the M that the combination of me meeting some of those needs when he really needed it (as opposed to OW's demanding, selfish ways)with the backing off and not pressuring him (as opposed to OW's demanding, selfish ways) had a huge impact. But, it took him some time to shift his thinking away from the script he had been operating from to justify everything. During that time, I had to ride that very painful roller coaster of getting close, pulling back, getting close, pulling back etc.
Ride it out, be a great dad, be supportive but not pressuring. And have your boundaries in place. You are doing a great job in a "gut wrenching" sitch. We are in your corner!
