I still have to rely on her when it comes to needing help picking up the girls. I don't have another option at this time. If I go full force into everything, she could pull that option out from under me and I don't have someone else to help with that situation.
Kevin
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
Instead of harping on what you DONT have why not seek out a solution so it becomes something you DO have.
Do your children not have any friends with parents? Why not see if some sort of carpool can be arranged? It will allow you to be more involved in the life of your children as it will allow you to get to know their friends and parents better and it would provide you with a SOLUTION instead of, as usual, relying on your W.
Instead of harping on what you DONT have why not seek out a solution so it becomes something you DO have.
Do your children not have any friends with parents? Why not see if some sort of carpool can be arranged? It will allow you to be more involved in the life of your children as it will allow you to get to know their friends and parents better and it would provide you with a SOLUTION instead of, as usual, relying on your W.
Good idea! I am sure you can arrange with another parent if need be. I do it all the time for my kids friends etc. I really like this idea of you being proactive and finding your own childcare.
Me: 46 FWS: 36 Married and Divorced 4/07, Pregnant 7/07,False R 7/07 Baby Girl born 3/08 Kicked him out because OW: 7/08 5/10 He realized what he had and lost. Moved home! REMARRIED 3/14/11!!
I don't know any of their friends or parents. I'm not sure they really have any outside of school. They don't ever hang out with them if they do.
Plus I live in a different suburb from there school.
Kevin
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
I understand what you are saying Kevin. But, once again DB princible number one "stop doing what isnt working". What isnt working is you still DEPENDING on your WAW. You need to show her the new, INDEPENDENT, CONFIDENT Kevin that is a MAN of Solutions and not PROBLEMS. Figure out how to live on your own as a single parent like the rest of us have had to do. Stop living in the same FANTASY world your WAW is.
Take back CONTROL of your life. Show her that you dont NEED HER to be HAPPY. In fact that you prefer a life with out her. Make her chase you for once. That is what GAL, PMA is all about.
Find some friends with kids, volunteer at the school to make friends with parents, stop whining and playing the victim game and TAKE BACK CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE. Go to AA, Co-Dependents Anon. Join church groups, Find happiness outside of your marriage NOT just the occasional "field trip" but real happiness.
And Re-Read your damn post. Lots of good $hit here!!! You could have wrote a best-selling book by now that would have taken care of your $ problems. Stop being a victim and be the victor!!!
Once again. Be William Wallace in Braveheart "FREEEEEDDDOOOMMM!!!!!!!"
I get so tired of your same, depressing attitude. It's been a year. Let your old marriage die and create a new life for yourself and your girls. It may be a new marriage w your WAW. That's ENTIRELY UP TO YOU!!!
If your main goal is to get your W back (and IMO that should NOT be your main goal) then why do you keep doing things that don't work? NOTHING you have done has worked. NOTHING. In fact the more you do the same things the more staunch your W becomes and that has been especially apparent over the past few weeks (her introducing OM to the kids, her inviting you out of pity to her parents house).
You know nothing you are doing is working. But you won't do anything else. I don't get it. I really don't.