What has happened here? You had a course of action and appear to have diverted from it entirely. While reading your posts and catching up, I could do little but shake my head. The email to the MIL-unneeded, returning the gifts from your wife-disrespectful, repeatedly telling her you can take care of everything-controlling.
She keep going back to what she said in the summer...guess what! She was lying...sorry...just the truth. You know it, I know it, the whole world knows it, but yet you continue to hang your hat on it.
I had warned you about getting angry....and your posts of late show a man drowning in anger. Time to right the ship. You think that she can get farther away. You ask if your behavior can drive her farther away....the answer is YES and I think you are more than likely doing a pretty could job at accomplishing that.
It has been frustrating for me to see you take so few steps towards truly regaining your personal identity. Hiding at home on Facebook or working isn't going to help you on the journey of personal enrichment that will help you in the end. Read the posts of people who have been on here longer than a year. See how there posts change in context.....that is what happens when you start finding good stable ground to stand on. Your posts haven't made it to that point.
This takes time...lots of time...and lots of self evaluation. I have been at it now for almost three years and my wife is deciding that I am the better choice. Guess what...I know I still have a lot of work to do....not for my marriage or for my wife....but for myself. Once you have regained your identity and self....everything else will fall into place.
Sorry about the 2x4....been awhile since I have been here, but I think you really need it.
