Hi di- I'm not always the best at giving or taking advice but think about what you said "I am going through the anger stage." Remember that it is a stage in the grieving process and it means that you are starting to heal. You need to go through this get to be emotionally healthy again. Not only that but you have a right to be angry, your H is not living up to his committment, his promise. It is all disappointing and painful to accept but you will get there. You will eventually let go of the anger and accept everything that has happened. Hopefully as you work through this, you will be able to look at your past and present and appreciate all the good in your life. IMO, when you can do that, thinking about the future seems so much brighter and the anger will fade.
No one will ever deny that going through something like this is a living hell, however there are positive things that will come out it. Look for those things. One is that you will realize (if you haven't already) that you are a lot stronger person than you ever thought you were.
