The analyzing of every single thing she does, well we all do it at the beginning and some even much longer…. But it doesn’t do a lot to help you.
I don’t know if I was the one who mentioned “tests” but yes they do test you to see if the changes are real. But like B said, the reponse actually has to be normal for you. As things happen consistently, that is what shows that your changes are real. It will show you as well as her.
You are starting to grasp this a little, but please try to remember, the steps in this process, they are not linear. You are a heart surgeon. You do A and the result is B. What you will find through this is that as you do A, she will do S and the response might be R, which will make her reaction be X. You have to take your time, be really prepared for all of the twists and turns, and know that what you are doing, is right for you. Regardless of what her response is.
Do your best, I know it is hard, to stop worrying 6 months or a year down the road. There is no prognosis right now, except that if you do the work, YOU will heal. YOU will learn a ton of stuff about yourself. YOU will be better. You will look back and say Wow, I have come a long way. I am a better father, I am a better man. That is what DB is really about.
"Acceptance doesn't mean resignation. It means understanding that something is what it is and there's got to be a way through it."--Michael J. Fox
