Just got back from going out with my wife. We went to Red Lobster. Kinda wasted some expensive food because I didn't really feel much like eating. We talked. About the past, what went wrong. She told me what she wanted. She wants a divorce. Says we got married too young, there were a ton of things she didn't do. I said I understood. Said that so many people have let her down in her life, she is tired of doing what everyone else wants. She had a really rough childhood, dad died when she was very young and mom was on drugs pretty bad. She still has to support her mom. She said she just needs to do some things for herself and she can't do this right now. Said she wants me to keep the house and everything in it. She only wants her clothes and personal affects. She thinks we could never have a fresh start if we try to work on the marriage, that maybe something can happen in the future and that is why she wants me to keep the house. She doesn't want this to get ugly and I can tell she still really cares about me.
I was not going to go into any of my feelings, but she kept prodding so since she wanted to know I told her. I told her I want our marriage to work. I want to work on it. I told her I needed to go to an IC and she said maybe she does too. I told her I believed she was the most beautiful woman ever, and she started to cry. Said I never told her that while we were together, which I know I did, but it probably has been a very long time. We had a good cry together, I went to drop her off and she said she is not 100% sure of this either. She said she knows of people that were worse off than us and got back together. I think she is just very very confused right now. I did tell her I can't force her to feel anything or change her mind, and I will not try anymore. I meant it. I am going to let her proceed with what she feels she needs to do, DB my butt off, and put it in God's hands. What else can I do? Anyone else get anything out of this that maybe I'm missing?
