Moving on with my life!

[S.T. _I Made It!]

oh ya, forgot it's txts. that is hard.

I wish I could babysit for you! I think that's cool that you went on a walk and that it was pleasant.

hey, fyi, because you have to have reigns on him with the baby, be prepared for unpleasant times after the garnishment. You just continue to be the same and don't let his irritation change your moods or push your buttons. cause it's going to happen, especially because you have to be right there with them.

[Startingover2]

I ended up going to MNF anyway as d18 stayed with baby for an hour or so for me. College game but it was fun just to get out.

At 9:45 exh sent a text "Hows baby?" I didn't respond but wanted to say 'its 9:45! How do you think she is? Sleeping?" He is so bizaarre.

No doubt today he will ask me if I got his text from last night and ask why I didn't respond.I hate those moments as I either have to lie or look like I am ignoring him.

[Startingover2]

Ok, now I know why he may have sent the Hows Baby text at 9:45...was just browsing FB and saw my d18 put a status on there saying "Watching baby sister with bf". Exh and d18 are friends on FB and he must have seen it.

Why do I feel like a kid that is going to get into trouble by his parents? That sick "oh no" feeling? Please tell me that leaving baby with my d18 is ok, not going to make a difference in custody, and no matter what exh says its not a bad thing!

Gabby: He does have too much control! I let him have it..now to take some back.

[Startingover2]

Talk me down because I am shaking. Not sure why this panics me but it does.

Text conversation:
Exh: Did you leave baby last night?
Me: Yes, for a bit.
Exh: Too much to call me and ask if I wanted to watch her?
Me: It was last minute and my kids and sister were here.

I don't want to point out the fact that he has supervised visits. So what does he care about? The fact that I left baby for the first time in months?

[Lost Rabbit]

Hiya, just wanted to give a bit of support as you sound rather stressed! Mums do need time away from bubs its good for both of you to have a bit of separate time.. If I can help at all keep posting!

[S.T. _I Made It!]

hey, I think your partly putting words in exh's mouth.

He would probably love to have an opportunity for unsupervised time, and there was his chance. I think that was totally expected. and you should bring it up that that is the reason! because if you make it about it being last minute, then what's he gonna say about when you have something planned that he finds out about.

don't be sick about this, there is NOTHING wrong with you going out for a bit. now, if you were nursing and went out all night drinking...that's another story.

there is also nothing wrong with an 18 year old watching...unless she has party problems, or you can't trust her not to have a boyfriend over, or something that would cause her to be distracted from babysitting.

so quit feeling guilty. MAKE this about his unsupervised visits...this is a COURT DECISION, not yours,

If you are okay with him having unsupervised when the courts make that decision...then you can also say, I'm sure you will do a great job watching her when the courts change their ruling after your able to show them your progress.

[Butterfly1]

Hi = checking in ... how about just ignoring this text. At least for 24/48 hrs until you knows he has supervised visits, then asking you for unsupervised visits is ridiculous and is baiting. You should not be the one to remind him of this fact.

[Startingover2]

If you are okay with him having unsupervised when the courts make that decision...then you can also say, I'm sure you will do a great job watching her when the courts change their ruling after your able to show them your progress.

Very good. I will remember that if/when it comes up again. I think its more about control than anything else with exh. If he truly wanted to spend more time with baby he would be making ALL of his visits and staying the maximum amount of time. I think it was shocking to see that I actually went somewhere.

Hi = checking in ... how about just ignoring this text. At least for 24/48 hrs until you knows he has supervised visits, then asking you for unsupervised visits is ridiculous and is baiting. You should not be the one to remind him of this fact.

He HATES that he has the supervised visits and he hasn't made the changes necessary so fighting them in court may be a bit off. If he can bully me he will.

He just sent the following text:
Exh: I would like to be with her the next time you go out. Not too much to ask. So, where did you go?

I am not responding.

Boundaries!

[iwantittowork]

I am not responding.

This is good. Don't respond. None of his business.

Not too much to ask

Not his decision, what you do with your time with kids, so it IS too much of him to ask, imho, especially in the WAY that he is asking..

Don't give in if he starts flailing away with txt's, etc, when you don't respond..

I'll have to read up more on your sitch, but wanted to pass along my thoughts to you, and pass along a hug...

[Startingover2]

I am not responding.

This is good. Don't respond. None of his business.

Not too much to ask

Not his decision, what you do with your time with kids, so it IS too much of him to ask, imho, especially in the WAY that he is asking..

Don't give in if he starts flailing away with txt's, etc, when you don't respond..

I'll have to read up more on your sitch, but wanted to pass along my thoughts to you, and pass along a hug...

Thank you! I appreciate all the support.