Thinker, How long has she been in IC? Have your tried a different MC?
She was in IC for 6 months or so and got nowhere. He was a pretty ineffective IC but essentially it was because she didn't want to make any changes and didn't really try.
She is now with a different IC who is a lot better, but that has only been 5 or 6 times. As part of this, he met with me as her spouse and (indirectly) indicated to me that she wasn't getting past blaming everything on me.
We met with 2 MC's and attended Retro. She left the first MC immediately because he was aggressively looking for commitment from her. She stuck with the 2nd for a while because he just listened as she shrugged her shoulders and refused to open up. It didn't go anywhere. She agreed to go to Retro, but sabotaged all of the exercises (used them as opportunities to bash me and the M rather than talking about the emotions she was supposed to talk about) and then refused to go to the follow up sessions.
I suggested a new MC last fall, but in the end she declined to go.
Last edited by Thinker; 01/05/1005:33 PM.
Me 42, W 39, S8, S6, S2 M 11y, A & ILYBNILWY 11/08 Walking away from a bad situation.
