First, the live in thing. I have been doing it for years. It sucks. IMO, I wouldn’t be so quick to let him back in. Not until you can really not be affected by his actions. Not until you are really ready to deal with daily anger, daily moodswings, daily crap. I still believe that one of the reasons my H got stuck, was because he never moved out.
I also know without a doubt that it was much harder for me to do what I needed to do. And it wore on my patience. It makes the road for each, that much more difficult. So please take it for what it is worth and really think about it before you take that leap. A whole different can of worms with a live in.
Sex, that is something you have to decide for you. We have each handled that differently. For some, it keeps the connection. For others, well it allows cake eating and can really wear on your self esteem.
As for the why don’t they just file? Well, this is MLC. At some point that will be enough of an explanation but…
Filing would make sense if you just wanted to end the M. But MLC doesn’t make sense. Just because something sounds good one second, that doesn’t mean it sounds good the next. And really, best thing or not, D is not easy. It does not feel good. MLCers try to avoid painful, difficult situations at all cost. Because it does not go along with the desire to just end all of the pain.
So let’s talk about you.
What are you doing for you? How are you being a better parent to your kids? How is work going? What are your goals, regardless of your H and his issues or actions?
"Acceptance doesn't mean resignation. It means understanding that something is what it is and there's got to be a way through it."--Michael J. Fox
