My UFO (unbelievably fabulous observations)

[hoosiermama]

A quick note...

Today D13 has the typical teenager's busy, over-scheduled life and she's really happy about it. Immediately after school, there's Yearbook committee (often she's the only one who shows up for it, so she has some real ownership) until 4 pm, and then at 5 she has volleyball tryouts. An hour in-between that she needs to be elsewhere because it's not ok with school to hang out unsupervised there. Since it's my evening at the 2nd job, I asked xH if he could pick her up at 4 and return her at 5; there's a McDonald's just down the street they could go grab a snack at. And I asked him this because when I was explaining her busy schedule for this week and expressing concern that his typical visitation schedule might not work, he said he'd be "happy to get her to activities and pick her up as needed." So after a bit of arguing, he agreed to do that. But when I talked with D13 at bedtime last night (she calls to say goodnite when she's at her dad's) she told me that he told her to go and hang out in the gym, or in the locker room if anyone questioned her. He's not going to pick her up and return her. And of course, he wasn't going to tell me that either.

This reminds me of this time last year, when D13 first met OW at a dinner get-together and was distraught about it--he didn't bother to prepare her for that, or even warn her it was happening. I confronted him angrily, and said that, per our prelim agreement she was NOT to be with OW until at least a year after he left, and I was holding him to that. After first telling me it was none of my business what D13 did when she was with him (hmmm, last I checked my daughter IS my business) he agreed to avoid contact between them. Then I found out in July--7 months later--that D had been instructed to keep it a secret and she and OW and family were together on a regular basis. xH completely disregarded my concerns and lied about it. (But then, we're all objects to him anyway.) He can't be trusted to prioritize D's needs, nor to be honest with me. Yeah, this is great co-parenting.