Praying for Light at the end of the Tunnel

[kjensen]

Grace-I value your opinion and experience here. I've always been open and positive about counseling, having been depressed in college while being treated as a go-between in my parents' divorce. I also had some therapy while dating H before we got married. H and I both were open about seeing or individual therapists and a marriage counselor...

And yet, both of my daughters are adamantly against seeing therapist. So I haven't pushed it, because I agree, I don't think therapy is as helpful unless you believe it will be and are willing to open up and look inside..

H called me at work today to ask for the therapist's phone number to reschedule the appintment he missed on 12/31. So at least he is still doing that(his family thought he had stopped therapy). I was upbeat and happy to hear from him. He shared he hadn't slept at all last night(so much for his theory that leaving me allowed him to sleep again)

I shared D12's meltdown and how she did end up sleeping in my bed and therefore I didn't sleep well(she tosses and turns and talks in her sleep). H actually was a good listener and responded with concern and empathy. I reminded H he could text or call me if he couldn't sleep(like he did during the first separation)...we ended the call on a positive note. I've been good in my DBing the last few FB chats and phonecalls..

Stopped wearing my weddng ring this weekend. I still panic periodically thinking its fallen off-hand feels naked..but I need to mentally move forward and I think that will help. If I'm going to stay married to H then I think we both need new rings and vows in the future..(H lost his wedding ring 3 years ago and never bothered to replace it).