K4D It's a Wonderful Life

[MrBond]

Wow I can't believe how fast this thread has grown in one day.

I think everyone needs to take a breather.

I don't believe that by him telling his W to not introduce the OM to the children is controlling. He is just establishing a BOUNDARY. Since the subject of introducing new relationships to the kids was talked about in C, I think he has every right to remind her again. If he was "controlling" he would have actually done something to prevent it. Establishing boundaries is a GOOD thing. It shows what kind of stuff he's not willing to tolerate.

If it's Kevin's choice to DB, then I think we should all respect that. No one has the right to tell him that he shouldn't be trying to save his M. Even when we detach, we all understand that we would like to save the M, but if it doesn't work out, we're also fine. If he wants to put it on the top of his list, then so be it. That's HIS CHOICE.

We all wouldn't be here if we didn't want to save our M, one way or another. And it didn't take all of us a day to get that "lightbulb moment" where we understood how to properly DB. If he needs to feel disgust at his W to help him successfully detach, then so be it. Many success stories got to that point too.

Let him take it one step at a time. One day at a time.