Yeah, sorry, but that sounds suspect. Unless she's been confiding in him about her R problems with another man and he's giving her advice...then that would make sense.
OK, that can certainly be construed as something going on between them; but it's also not concrete proof of an affair, either.
You can do as you feel, but I think you're going to inflame the situation and not make much progress. He won't admit to an A.
Me: 44, Wife: 39 M: 17 years T: 20 years Bomb on 08/25/09 1/13/10: MC started 1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs 8/28/10: Wife moved out No talk of D, no movement
Yeah, sorry, but that sounds suspect. Unless she's been confiding in him about her R problems with another man and he's giving her advice...then that would make sense.
She is married. It could be she is confiding in him and he in her...just as bad.
M44 H41 M20 T23 3 older teens Bomb Nov 09 "i'm not happy" EA Nov 09 w/coworker Another PA in Mar 10 I Filed Apr 10 D final Dec 10
I've been trying to get caught up on your situation, and I'm not sure what your end goal is right now.
Are you trying to reconcile with your husband? Or are you just tearing each other up until one or the other decides to file for D?
If you are trying to reconcile, you need to get a handle on your emotions. Yelling at him and beating him up will get you exactly nowhere. You are projecting a state of anger and insecurity and resentment -- and those are not things that will bring him back.
If he does have a drinking problem, then that introduces extra challenges. There are all sorts of programs for spouses/relatives/children of alcoholics; that would be a good place to start.
What about the OW? How much concrete proof do you have? Because it looks like if you don't have something concrete by now, you'll never get it because he and the OW will push their relationship underground.
Of course, if you believe you are beyond reconciliation at this point, then you should consider filing for D yourself.
Me: 44, Wife: 39 M: 17 years T: 20 years Bomb on 08/25/09 1/13/10: MC started 1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs 8/28/10: Wife moved out No talk of D, no movement
Trent - of course I want my marriage to work. I know I need to get a handle on my emotions...I do. The only reason I haven't filed for divorce is because I have no concrete evidence. I am not beating up my H he is doing it to me. I think I've been supportive and understanding enough! I am standing my ground and will not let him walk all over me.
I have nothing else to do right now but work on me. I have no control over his behavior. He has been sending me mixed messages and I'm sick of it.
Right now all I can do is take care of me and my kids.
M44 H41 M20 T23 3 older teens Bomb Nov 09 "i'm not happy" EA Nov 09 w/coworker Another PA in Mar 10 I Filed Apr 10 D final Dec 10
