I wonder if those things, the car and the tax money, are just his excuse to have a reason to contact you...
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
I wonder if those things, the car and the tax money, are just his excuse to have a reason to contact you...
I'm guessing, no! The money is long gone, and the car is too much trouble. Even if it is no trouble.
My crystal ball say that as (((((Michelle))))) continues to live well, and be successful, he is going to hear about it (though his family) and have regrets. But it doens't really matter, does it?
When I first got on here I had so many people tell me that the LBS almost always gets to choose the final outcome of the M.
I didn't believe them. I felt like I had no control over the R at that point.
But it was finally my decision. I was the one who had to finalize the D. And he is the one who seems to have regrets that pop up here and there.
He seems to be getting his life together. He is supposed to have all his credit card debt paid off by March. His sister said he's been doing AA (which makes me think his letter might have actually been part of his AA, either one of the things he was supposed to do or something he was inspired to do as he was going through the steps).
But I'm not waiting for him anymore. Haven't been for about a year and a half.
Michelle - Proud DR Rockette S: 28JUL07, D'd: 29OCT09 http://tinyurl.com/27j9qo2
Boy, isn't that the truth Michelle. Look! You, me, Jeff, Julia, Lisa....all LBS and all of us finalized our D's because our WAS's pulled the trigger but only wounded the horse. We had to put it down.
Oh lordy, I just had flashbacks to Western movies!!! Good grief, where did that analogy come from?
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
Interesting thoughts, hadn't heard that about the LBS making the final decision.
Do you mean just Marriage in the legal sense? Or the entire R?
Seems to me that the majority of D's happen very quickly. Though that certainly hasn't been the case for most of on here.
I do have a friend who's W filed immediately at S and finalized at 60-day waiting mark. Maybe just urban legend, but my impression was that's the norm.
Me: 30 W: 28 T 8, M 6 S: 7-27-2007 W filed (again) 3-2011 Served 8-2011 Responded, now dark "I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear" MLK
The stats I have seen in CA are that the average D takes 2 years. Of course, CA has a 6 month waiting period.
The WAS almost always has doubts at some point, which slows down the process. They have a hard time pulling the trigger. A lot of times its cuz depression makes doing ANYTHING very difficult (and a LOT of WASs are very depressed).
The LBS almost always has to be the one to close the door. Whether it's because the WAS has co-dependency issues or depression or is MLC or all of the above, they can't break it off completely.
Who knows why really. None of us have been in that position, so we can't really know what it's like.
Michelle - Proud DR Rockette S: 28JUL07, D'd: 29OCT09 http://tinyurl.com/27j9qo2
The stats I have seen in CA are that the average D takes 2 years. Of course, CA has a 6 month waiting period.
Wow, that's a big gap. And from all the times I've heard or said myself "WAS is moving full steam ahead", it doesn't happen most of the time. Interesting.
I guess it goes to show that for almost all of them the greener grass was over the septic tank.
Me: 30 W: 28 T 8, M 6 S: 7-27-2007 W filed (again) 3-2011 Served 8-2011 Responded, now dark "I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear" MLK
