Thanks antlers, you are so right. I do harbor a lot of feelings of insecurity probably feelings I had before the marriage and ones that got magnified by being with a verbally and emotionally abusive man. So now I find myself with even more issues to deal with. And like you say, the only way to deal with them is by myself. Is by learning to be happy - really happy ( and there's a big difference to looking happy and really being happy) by myself - just me and my daughter. I'm afraid that might take years and then I'll be too old to find a partner and because of all the pain inflicted by my xH I'll have spent most of the best years of my life trying to fix myself. I've spent all my thirties - met him on my 30th bday and just celebrated my 40th - wasted on him - sucks!!!
I don't want to spend the next decade undoing everything done to me - he moved on in a few months - if that even. But it just shows how little emotional investment he had in us.
