SOrry Deb, didn't mean to bring any bad memories. I'm not looking for causes anymore myself, although sometimes I have a thought or something happens and I write it . In this case I wrote it here.
I hope your situation soon improves, and that you can start building good memories to replace all te bad ones.
Nightshade
"Each and every one of us is deserving of a kind word, a gentle thought and the gift of understanding. "